I am not a big fan of Christmas. But this year I loved it!
Selfishly, I did not have to share my family with anyone. We did not have to drive for four to five hours and sleep in one or the other parents house and hope that we were not upsetting someone. We did not have to do lunch here, breakfast there and dinner somewhere else. We did not feel like we were possessions being tossed, pulled or shoved.
We had the privilege of being a family at home in our own home; just the four of us and Charlie the dog.
We were supposed to be joined by some friends (who we knew wouldn't) because they are far too selfish and wanted us to come to their house. We have young children who want to enjoy their toys, their children are grown up and we spent 13 years at their house for Christmas. Besides since they both have lost a licence for DUI it really doesn't even require a discussion for them of who is designated driver!
Alas we were the bigger people and went to their boxing day party and unlike them I brought my children and taught them how to behave. My girls have manners and know how to act. Their teenagers have no manners, no graciousness and certainly are not grateful or respectful. Not even a thank you for the little gift the girls bought them. These are teens who can't make their own lunch, tea or breakfast and can't even cook toast! What hope is there for them in the real world? The evening was pierced with ungrateful comments about the very flashy coffee maker in their kitchen.
"I wanted a juicer! Does this look like a juicer?"
"I only drink flat white, not fancy coffee, why would I want this?"
The fact that these two have the most toxic of relationships makes the above discourse seem friendly, but the sheer lack of gratitude astounds me.
Moving on to the next bunch of ungrateful people - in laws! We bought them a calendar of the girls, some doublemint gum which you have not been able to get for years and they used to use at tennis all the time and they had extra large gifts for their birthdays this year, which was also to form part of their Christmas gifts. Several hundred dollars worth! Apparently though, that was not good enough.
Really! These are people who have everything and need nothing. Again where is the gratitude for the thought? I thought of many of my clients who would be alone, sick, lonely, hungry or harming themselves, wouldn't they love to have any of this? I sometimes wonder if they are not in some ways better off for never having had any of the wealth which brings this ungrateful behaviour to the fore!
Me, well I was spoilt. I have my family back and that in itself is enough. I finally got a Wii and well it is harder than I thought! I also now have a new sound dock as my children have commandeered my Bose sound dock in their bedroom.
I heard from my sister in law, just a text. But I was glad to know she is okay and my mother in law and her husband cooked her lunch on her birthday.
We have money saved and gifted to do some concreting of one shed floor. We caught up with friends and it was a great relaxed time.
I appreciate the time I had with my family and our friends who came to join us later. The joy in seeing our girls and their little mate Jackson rip through the house and backyard and have a ball jumping on the new trampoline (which by the way was easy to put up!). The house was easy to tidy and the kids hardly made a mess, which is in itself another gift!
So as the year comes to a close an my journey is travelling in a positive direction, I would like to take the time to wish you a Happy New Year. May it be safe and filled with hope.
If the past year has not been what you want, create yourself a better year. Take charge of your destiny, steer the carriages the way you want them to go.
Will I travel this way next year? Well who knows.....with a masters degree in process and a Managerial position requiring systemic change and data analysis and political pushing, I may not have time. However, the Gratitude Train has helped me get back on track and I hope that if you are off course that you too will find your way.
xxxx
Friday, 30 December 2011
Sunday, 18 December 2011
HARD TIMES
Well it is Christmas the most wonderful time of the year! Who sang that ridiculous song? I bet it was Frank Sinatra!
I find Christmas hard. I am not sure why, so I began to reflect. Last year I was still separated from my husband, but we spent it together as a family at my mums. That in itself is a colossal effort. She spoke to my daughter like a piece of dirt and very much reminded me of why I had a hard time growing up. No one speaks to my child like that.
I am still reeling from the affair, even though it is long since over, I wonder, I doubt, I wish hindsight would just get out of my sight!
My sister in law, or should I say ex, it would be her birthday this Saturday and I would reach out, but can't as I don't know where she is at with the family, me or anything in life. I told her some honest thoughts earlier in the year about how she MAY be perceived through the things she was writing to the family and wanted to protect her from the crap that they all put me through. To protect her was not my role, I see that now and hope I didn't make it worse! Last I knew she told someone that we weren't talking. I took her off my FB page to protect myself from knowing anything and having to lie to anyone. I am hopeless at lying as you would know from my post on Being Authentic. http://gratitude-train.blogspot.com/2011/10/being-authentic.html
I took her off as I myself was also not in a good place and just needed my energy for myself and my struggle with PND.
So I wonder about her and how she is finding the "single life". Is it easier for her as she has family who will help, or is it harder or the same?
In the type of work I do I see so much misery at this time. It is hard to switch off from that when you have an overdeveloped sense of empathy. I wish that I could erase the misery from so many even for just a day, but then that is really about how I feel and would probably be worse for them long term.
I am grateful for so much too and that is where I realised I should focus my reflection. I am grateful to have my family back together and the opportunity to work on that.
I am grateful for two beautiful and individual children.
I am grateful for some truly awesome friends that I have had since high school.
I am grateful to be part of an awesome work team and have brilliant mentors around me.
I am grateful to be healthy.
I am grateful to be me and living the life I do.
My journey is taking me where I need to go.
xxxxx
I find Christmas hard. I am not sure why, so I began to reflect. Last year I was still separated from my husband, but we spent it together as a family at my mums. That in itself is a colossal effort. She spoke to my daughter like a piece of dirt and very much reminded me of why I had a hard time growing up. No one speaks to my child like that.
I am still reeling from the affair, even though it is long since over, I wonder, I doubt, I wish hindsight would just get out of my sight!
My sister in law, or should I say ex, it would be her birthday this Saturday and I would reach out, but can't as I don't know where she is at with the family, me or anything in life. I told her some honest thoughts earlier in the year about how she MAY be perceived through the things she was writing to the family and wanted to protect her from the crap that they all put me through. To protect her was not my role, I see that now and hope I didn't make it worse! Last I knew she told someone that we weren't talking. I took her off my FB page to protect myself from knowing anything and having to lie to anyone. I am hopeless at lying as you would know from my post on Being Authentic. http://gratitude-train.blogspot.com/2011/10/being-authentic.html
I took her off as I myself was also not in a good place and just needed my energy for myself and my struggle with PND.
So I wonder about her and how she is finding the "single life". Is it easier for her as she has family who will help, or is it harder or the same?
In the type of work I do I see so much misery at this time. It is hard to switch off from that when you have an overdeveloped sense of empathy. I wish that I could erase the misery from so many even for just a day, but then that is really about how I feel and would probably be worse for them long term.
I am grateful for so much too and that is where I realised I should focus my reflection. I am grateful to have my family back together and the opportunity to work on that.
I am grateful for two beautiful and individual children.
I am grateful for some truly awesome friends that I have had since high school.
I am grateful to be part of an awesome work team and have brilliant mentors around me.
I am grateful to be healthy.
I am grateful to be me and living the life I do.
My journey is taking me where I need to go.
xxxxx
Tuesday, 6 December 2011
WINNERS ARE GRINNERS!
Winners are grinners!
This past week that has been the absolute truth.
Despite a rough (will be for a while) ride in my reluctant journey into management, there was a silver lining; many prompt responses for attendance to my next meeting - small things make me happy in this job!
After a day that seemed less than happiness on Thursday, with hubby having to take the day off due to a sick little Miss 4 for the second day in a row, I just felt flat. Mother guilt had set in, end of the working week, knowing that I had a deadline to make some curtains for the Miss Ella Skye Backyard Dreams Project and that I should not have changed the colour scheme so late; the house was scruffy and the washing was thankfully not too far behind.
Then I did my e-mail check once the girls were in bed and the house had a run through tidy up. I had won the DirtGirlWorld Grubby giveaway from Childhood 101 with the amazing Christie Burnett. So now my two little "Dirt Girls" will have some new CD's and DVD's for when it is too hot this summer or too wet in the winter! I was thrilled, I WON - woo hoo.
Then I did the inevitable and went online to Facebook and to Childhood 101, got sidetracked and went back to my e-mails. Then surprise number 2 for the night......Pinky McKay, yes the famous author and mother of five and a nurse to boot, liked my comment on her Facebook page. Well actually she didn't like it, she commented below and said she loved my comment. It was a huge thrill and an honour. Further on she also agreed with another reader and I about our views on the bias towards mothers in their role, rather than it being a familial focus.
I then had the honour of being the cubby house queen and waving my magic over a plain little cubby house in a plain little backyard. Now my part was easy sort of ( I had never seen the cubby before mind you). The hard yakka the other team members had to put in though was well rewarded by a fabulous looking garden that was friendly to the needs of a disabled child and her family. It was a job well done by all and then others pitched in more and more towards the end of the day. The excitement and apprehension grew and then came the reveal at about 8:45 that evening. Ella was "wow", jumped on her trampoline, loved her fairy garden and new tea set and table and chairs and walked into the cubby and said "Oh WOW". She was in awe and I was rewarded with something money just can't buy- pure gratitude from the purest of children.
Her mum and dad loved it too, lost for words and a little wine weary they could not believe what we had done for them. I was invited back the next night to share this with my girls who helped me shop and sew. For the first time my 4 year old did not take 2 hours to warm up - she was straight in there and playing- double happiness for me! See my previous post AMAZING to understand what this is all about
So I am still on my grinning high, how can I not be. I see on Facebook the fabulous work we all did for one family who just needed a break and asked nothing of it. We sent them off on a trip for the day with day spas, cars for the dad, picnic lunch and wineries and a splendid meal at A Hereford Beefstouw. We helped some people, raised some serious cash and did some good old fashioned "lending a hand".
For more information and pictures see:http://www.liahealyblog.com
For the fabulous Childhood 101 site here is the link, boredom will be a word of the past and no electricity is required for many of these great learning activities.
http://childhood101.com.
So I will grin away and know I am the luckiest person in the world this week. It is not the first time either, did I tell you about the time I won a new Dyson vacuum? No, well maybe another time.
Until my next who knows when post, stay happy, on track and grateful for all the little things we have, because from little things - big things grow!
This past week that has been the absolute truth.
Despite a rough (will be for a while) ride in my reluctant journey into management, there was a silver lining; many prompt responses for attendance to my next meeting - small things make me happy in this job!
After a day that seemed less than happiness on Thursday, with hubby having to take the day off due to a sick little Miss 4 for the second day in a row, I just felt flat. Mother guilt had set in, end of the working week, knowing that I had a deadline to make some curtains for the Miss Ella Skye Backyard Dreams Project and that I should not have changed the colour scheme so late; the house was scruffy and the washing was thankfully not too far behind.
Then I did my e-mail check once the girls were in bed and the house had a run through tidy up. I had won the DirtGirlWorld Grubby giveaway from Childhood 101 with the amazing Christie Burnett. So now my two little "Dirt Girls" will have some new CD's and DVD's for when it is too hot this summer or too wet in the winter! I was thrilled, I WON - woo hoo.
Then I did the inevitable and went online to Facebook and to Childhood 101, got sidetracked and went back to my e-mails. Then surprise number 2 for the night......Pinky McKay, yes the famous author and mother of five and a nurse to boot, liked my comment on her Facebook page. Well actually she didn't like it, she commented below and said she loved my comment. It was a huge thrill and an honour. Further on she also agreed with another reader and I about our views on the bias towards mothers in their role, rather than it being a familial focus.
I then had the honour of being the cubby house queen and waving my magic over a plain little cubby house in a plain little backyard. Now my part was easy sort of ( I had never seen the cubby before mind you). The hard yakka the other team members had to put in though was well rewarded by a fabulous looking garden that was friendly to the needs of a disabled child and her family. It was a job well done by all and then others pitched in more and more towards the end of the day. The excitement and apprehension grew and then came the reveal at about 8:45 that evening. Ella was "wow", jumped on her trampoline, loved her fairy garden and new tea set and table and chairs and walked into the cubby and said "Oh WOW". She was in awe and I was rewarded with something money just can't buy- pure gratitude from the purest of children.
Her mum and dad loved it too, lost for words and a little wine weary they could not believe what we had done for them. I was invited back the next night to share this with my girls who helped me shop and sew. For the first time my 4 year old did not take 2 hours to warm up - she was straight in there and playing- double happiness for me! See my previous post AMAZING to understand what this is all about
So I am still on my grinning high, how can I not be. I see on Facebook the fabulous work we all did for one family who just needed a break and asked nothing of it. We sent them off on a trip for the day with day spas, cars for the dad, picnic lunch and wineries and a splendid meal at A Hereford Beefstouw. We helped some people, raised some serious cash and did some good old fashioned "lending a hand".
For more information and pictures see:http://www.liahealyblog.com
For the fabulous Childhood 101 site here is the link, boredom will be a word of the past and no electricity is required for many of these great learning activities.
http://childhood101.com.
So I will grin away and know I am the luckiest person in the world this week. It is not the first time either, did I tell you about the time I won a new Dyson vacuum? No, well maybe another time.
Until my next who knows when post, stay happy, on track and grateful for all the little things we have, because from little things - big things grow!
Monday, 21 November 2011
Speaking Out!
White Ribbon Day
It is November 25th this year, Friday that is!
If you haven't heard of it, well now you have! There is no longer an excuse to bury your head in the sand.
In support of Wanderlust and all the other victims of this abuse lets all speak out and stop burying our collective heads in the sand.
Domestic violence against women and children is happening every day around you.
Not in my neighbourhood....think again. It is much nicer to think that it is not happening though, isn't it? The reason many people feel this way is because they don't know what to do.
Speak Out
Domestic Violence is everywhere. Many people think that it is something that is of a bygone era or that it is for those in the less fortunate areas, maybe they think it is only for those affected by substance abuse.
Maybe they don't realise it can happen to anybody.
At the start of this year in response to a friend I started facebooking information out on this subject. They needed help and due to their situation, some randomly read posts was the safest option for them in a shared forum.
http://www.theduluthmodel.org/pdf/PowerandControl.pdf
The address above is one of the images that I connected people to, to highlight what DV is and is not. It is an insightful resource.
Inadvertently I offended a family member who thought I was talking about her situation. I wasn't, whilst hers was a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship, the friend I was helping was in danger. They were isolated in a rural area, did not know how to access help, substance abuse was also involved and there were children too. This friend I grew up with at a distance and we became friends later, what saddens me is that from what I know of her childhood, the same is now happening to her as an adult. Her husband is a wealthy, respected farmer, involved in many charities and committees in their town.
Early intervention is the key in all areas of life.
Back to the family member who has now left her husband. I am in two minds about this as she never gave him the chance to seek help and see if it could all work and he was willing. We have since also learnt that she only married him to have children and knew they were not ideal together. It doesn't condone her partners behaviour, but sometimes the violence can be lessened, this is a case where I feel it could have and therefore the 2 little boys in the midst of this would not have had to endure what they have. She and her husband were both well educated people in management streams, middle class comfort.
I have another friend who today told me that she was thrilled to only be losing her licence for three months and 3 days. She blew in the mid to high range. Her partner and her were at a celebration and he was being an idiot (as he is when alcohol is involved) and so she decided to leave. He came after her and started yelling and having a go at her because if she went how was the car going to get home and there was no way it was going to be left in the car-park! He has already lost his licence for a couple of years for driving under the influence! So after a heated argument and pushing and shoving she gets in and drives.
All the while he is putting her down, calling her a fat arsed skank, stupid, bimbo, slut and believe it or not a whole lot worse (I have heard it all from him). He is poking her and pinching her whilst she is trying to drive. They are driving over a bridge and there is a breath testing station at the base and he is smashing her head into the steering wheel and pulling her hair at this stage, she is just trying to drive and stay on the road. She nearly ran over the police officer.
When she gets out and she is already crying and in a state; they breath test her and she openly admits to drinking and driving. The officer asks her about what was going on in the car as he could see that she looked like she was being shoved, she tells him. Charges are laid on her partner.
Guess what? She is still with him. It annoys the life out of me as her two kids now entering their teens are witness to this. The daughter now comes with her own set of issues and their 12 year old son, thinks his parents are losers and becomes very upset when they fight. I have given them both all of the resources I can to get help for themselves, each other, their children. You can lead a horse to water......
For teens and adults affected by this and for the accompanying troubles within that lifestyle go to http://au.reachout.com/. They have great easy to read resources and contacts nationwide.
I grew up knowing my parents were not suited to each other, different. I can honestly say though that I never saw them argue, never heard it either. I know they disagreed, had different opinions, but violence was just not part of our lives. I am truly grateful for that, so thank you mum and dad.
Due to my mother and I clashing though I did live informally with a foster family. Have I told you about how wonderful they are? Will do so one day.
From time to time came emergency foster kids. I remember Hayley. Her stepdad used to bash her, but not her younger sister. Hayley was 13 or 14, I was 11 or 12 the same as her younger sister. So Hayley came to my foster family. She did not know about hygiene ( you have to wet all of your hair to wash it!), she did not know about feminine products or cycles, she did not have a clue about life in general. I remember thinking she had the prettiest face, much prettier than her "nasty" younger sister. One day she was struggling with her very basic maths homework. I was year 7, she was year 9 and I helped (think I did it) her with her homework, she had no idea how to do multiplication. That was the day that it became clear to all of us that she had suffered some kind of brain damage at the hands of her mother and stepfather. How cruel, how utterly disgusting to do that to another human being. What gave them the right.
So to all the Hayley's, Will's, Carly's and kids you are always in my thoughts. I work with adults who began as your story everyday and I pray that you don't end up as they have.
To the rest of us I say educate yourself, speak up and out, reach out to another, but know when to back away and that some people just make bad choices.
If you are looking for other ways to support people affected by domestic violence I could write you a whole blog on that topic alone. However buy the Big Issue it supports the vendor, many of whom are victims at some stage in their life. Or checkout the lovely Lina at http://mothersloveletters.com as she has found a beneficial and aesthetically pleasing, not to mention useful way to help.
If you are in South Australia this may help.
http://www.keepsafestaycool.com.au/Downloads/DV%20The%20Facts%20A5%20V4.pdf
Nationally
http://www.salvationarmy.org.au/services/domestic-violence-services.html
http://au.reachout.com
If you do find yourself in this situation or know of somebody who is, it is never too late to speak out.
Take care and I hope your journey is not a painful one.
XXXXX
It is November 25th this year, Friday that is!
If you haven't heard of it, well now you have! There is no longer an excuse to bury your head in the sand.
In support of Wanderlust and all the other victims of this abuse lets all speak out and stop burying our collective heads in the sand.
Domestic violence against women and children is happening every day around you.
Not in my neighbourhood....think again. It is much nicer to think that it is not happening though, isn't it? The reason many people feel this way is because they don't know what to do.
Speak Out
Domestic Violence is everywhere. Many people think that it is something that is of a bygone era or that it is for those in the less fortunate areas, maybe they think it is only for those affected by substance abuse.
Maybe they don't realise it can happen to anybody.
At the start of this year in response to a friend I started facebooking information out on this subject. They needed help and due to their situation, some randomly read posts was the safest option for them in a shared forum.
http://www.theduluthmodel.org/pdf/PowerandControl.pdf
The address above is one of the images that I connected people to, to highlight what DV is and is not. It is an insightful resource.
Inadvertently I offended a family member who thought I was talking about her situation. I wasn't, whilst hers was a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship, the friend I was helping was in danger. They were isolated in a rural area, did not know how to access help, substance abuse was also involved and there were children too. This friend I grew up with at a distance and we became friends later, what saddens me is that from what I know of her childhood, the same is now happening to her as an adult. Her husband is a wealthy, respected farmer, involved in many charities and committees in their town.
Early intervention is the key in all areas of life.
Back to the family member who has now left her husband. I am in two minds about this as she never gave him the chance to seek help and see if it could all work and he was willing. We have since also learnt that she only married him to have children and knew they were not ideal together. It doesn't condone her partners behaviour, but sometimes the violence can be lessened, this is a case where I feel it could have and therefore the 2 little boys in the midst of this would not have had to endure what they have. She and her husband were both well educated people in management streams, middle class comfort.
I have another friend who today told me that she was thrilled to only be losing her licence for three months and 3 days. She blew in the mid to high range. Her partner and her were at a celebration and he was being an idiot (as he is when alcohol is involved) and so she decided to leave. He came after her and started yelling and having a go at her because if she went how was the car going to get home and there was no way it was going to be left in the car-park! He has already lost his licence for a couple of years for driving under the influence! So after a heated argument and pushing and shoving she gets in and drives.
All the while he is putting her down, calling her a fat arsed skank, stupid, bimbo, slut and believe it or not a whole lot worse (I have heard it all from him). He is poking her and pinching her whilst she is trying to drive. They are driving over a bridge and there is a breath testing station at the base and he is smashing her head into the steering wheel and pulling her hair at this stage, she is just trying to drive and stay on the road. She nearly ran over the police officer.
When she gets out and she is already crying and in a state; they breath test her and she openly admits to drinking and driving. The officer asks her about what was going on in the car as he could see that she looked like she was being shoved, she tells him. Charges are laid on her partner.
Guess what? She is still with him. It annoys the life out of me as her two kids now entering their teens are witness to this. The daughter now comes with her own set of issues and their 12 year old son, thinks his parents are losers and becomes very upset when they fight. I have given them both all of the resources I can to get help for themselves, each other, their children. You can lead a horse to water......
For teens and adults affected by this and for the accompanying troubles within that lifestyle go to http://au.reachout.com/. They have great easy to read resources and contacts nationwide.
I grew up knowing my parents were not suited to each other, different. I can honestly say though that I never saw them argue, never heard it either. I know they disagreed, had different opinions, but violence was just not part of our lives. I am truly grateful for that, so thank you mum and dad.
Due to my mother and I clashing though I did live informally with a foster family. Have I told you about how wonderful they are? Will do so one day.
From time to time came emergency foster kids. I remember Hayley. Her stepdad used to bash her, but not her younger sister. Hayley was 13 or 14, I was 11 or 12 the same as her younger sister. So Hayley came to my foster family. She did not know about hygiene ( you have to wet all of your hair to wash it!), she did not know about feminine products or cycles, she did not have a clue about life in general. I remember thinking she had the prettiest face, much prettier than her "nasty" younger sister. One day she was struggling with her very basic maths homework. I was year 7, she was year 9 and I helped (think I did it) her with her homework, she had no idea how to do multiplication. That was the day that it became clear to all of us that she had suffered some kind of brain damage at the hands of her mother and stepfather. How cruel, how utterly disgusting to do that to another human being. What gave them the right.
So to all the Hayley's, Will's, Carly's and kids you are always in my thoughts. I work with adults who began as your story everyday and I pray that you don't end up as they have.
To the rest of us I say educate yourself, speak up and out, reach out to another, but know when to back away and that some people just make bad choices.
If you are looking for other ways to support people affected by domestic violence I could write you a whole blog on that topic alone. However buy the Big Issue it supports the vendor, many of whom are victims at some stage in their life. Or checkout the lovely Lina at http://mothersloveletters.com as she has found a beneficial and aesthetically pleasing, not to mention useful way to help.
If you are in South Australia this may help.
http://www.keepsafestaycool.com.au/Downloads/DV%20The%20Facts%20A5%20V4.pdf
Nationally
http://www.salvationarmy.org.au/services/domestic-violence-services.html
http://au.reachout.com
If you do find yourself in this situation or know of somebody who is, it is never too late to speak out.
Take care and I hope your journey is not a painful one.
XXXXX
Friday, 18 November 2011
ABOUT AMBITION
I am jealous of planned and ambitious people!
The sort who are always together, knows their stuff, are directed, officious and make things look easy.
Jealous because I am in all essence the opposite. I am a drifter, I fall into things rather than plan, I am a procrastinator and I blame that on being a balanced Libran - I see two sides to everything.
I fell into nursing, I fell into year 12, I fell into university, love and marriage. I am not sure that I have ever actively planned and controlled anything in my life. I have never been a planner.
I never planned to get married - I did.
I never planned my pregnancies and they came to me when they should have.
I never planned my career - but I am always landed with opportunities.
In the past year I have been inundated with jobs and job offers. All great, all I am passionate about.
I took one, it was a three month stint. I took it because I felt I had the skills to take it on and make effects within that three month period.
Now 7 months later I am suddenly the level 3 RN in our team.
This is not the first time I have been a level 3 RN, but it has been a long time. Since then I have had children and my priorities in life have changed. I no longer live, eat and breathe work......
I do the work I do because I love it and I am passionate about it, not for any other reason. Prior to being the level 3 I thought I had the best job in the world. It was a combination of all three of my passions - teaching, community and critical or advanced care. My level 3 is amazing in every sense of the word, she has it all, brains beauty and just one of the nicest people I have ever met.
I have big shoes to fill, but only for 7 months. I wouldn't have taken this in a permanent sense. I feel fraudulent for even having the role - how did I end up here? Yes I went through all the normal routes and interviews. Why didn't I stop and say thanks but no thanks? Why is NO such a hard word for me to say?
I love my level 3 and for some strange reason she has faith in me. She also knows I will keep the program true in its path and I have no agendas and she thinks I won't stuff it up in her absence. I really hope I don't.
You would think I have never been here before, but I have. Last year instead of getting the casual lecturing role I sought, I ended up being the lead lecturer and location coordinator. Prior to that I had acting team leader and quality coordinator roles; Clinical Nurse roles at level 2 and level 3 Clinical Nurse Educator roles.
 |
| First group of international students as a Course Coordinator Now the University has several groups running concurrently. |
None of them I asked for, all of them I was asked to do and I did and apparently well.
I know I am a good nurse. I know I am great with the clients I have.
I don't think I am a good leader. I don't do authoritarian and I am a hopeless delegator, I always teeter on trying to be a friend to those I am supposed to lead and in doing so I fail to delegate.
Now it is time for me to "man up", take the lead, take charge. But what if I don't know what I am doing? Say the wrong thing or look stupid?
Once that really would have bothered me and from a personal level. Now I don't actually care what people think of me, but worry that what I do will reflect badly for the rest on my team.
So maybe fate controls me, but it is time for me to take control. I am grateful to receive the challenge, I think...........
This is my unplanned journey and I need to know the destination.
Stay tuned for this one as I fumble and stumble and make the odd bumble.
XXX Fiona
Once that really would have bothered me and from a personal level. Now I don't actually care what people think of me, but worry that what I do will reflect badly for the rest on my team.
So maybe fate controls me, but it is time for me to take control. I am grateful to receive the challenge, I think...........
This is my unplanned journey and I need to know the destination.
Stay tuned for this one as I fumble and stumble and make the odd bumble.
XXX Fiona
Monday, 14 November 2011
Dyson Delights
I love vacuuming.
Don't panic you read correctly I really love vacuuming and cleaning bathrooms. I don't care for the rest of the household chores.
To me there is nothing more rewarding than starting out with a crumb, dog hair, dry play dough covered floor and as you vacuum, you can see you are removing the detritus away.
Every time you vacuum you get to start with a clean slate again.
Last year when times were tough in my life, my computer and work became my life. I would sit on it for hours at night after having finished all of my jobs, working away, I rarely slept more than 3-4 hours.
I used to give myself breaks and wander aimlessly through websites. One night I obviously entered a competition. I never enter competitions.
It was on the AsthmaSA site and there was a Kids Breathe Better link. A competition was running and you just needed to write your story about your child's asthma.
So I did...apparently. I was away camping at our piece of Paradise in October last year when I checked my e-mails and there was an e-mail telling me I had won a DC23 Turbo vacuum from Dyson through the Kids Breathe Better Competition.
I almost deleted it. I thought it was SPAM, a joke, a virus on my MAC.
However it was true. I was one of 500 around the country who won a vacuum.
So it means my writing was maybe not so great with so many winners, but that is besides the point.
I WON.
I needed a vacuum, my estranged husband had my beloved Dyson at his house in the country where it was REALLY needed and I was using my mums spare Dyson upright.
I was so grateful for this wonderful prize and I put it to good work every few days.
This was truly the highlight of my life last year. I told everyone how excited I was to have a new vacuum and be using it.
They all thought I was mad.
That vacuum was a sign of hope to me at that time and I cherish it, (you wouldn't think so if you saw what it lifts from my floors though!).
I was just so lucky.
Try your luck you just never know!
Don't panic you read correctly I really love vacuuming and cleaning bathrooms. I don't care for the rest of the household chores.
To me there is nothing more rewarding than starting out with a crumb, dog hair, dry play dough covered floor and as you vacuum, you can see you are removing the detritus away.
Every time you vacuum you get to start with a clean slate again.
Last year when times were tough in my life, my computer and work became my life. I would sit on it for hours at night after having finished all of my jobs, working away, I rarely slept more than 3-4 hours.
I used to give myself breaks and wander aimlessly through websites. One night I obviously entered a competition. I never enter competitions.
It was on the AsthmaSA site and there was a Kids Breathe Better link. A competition was running and you just needed to write your story about your child's asthma.
So I did...apparently. I was away camping at our piece of Paradise in October last year when I checked my e-mails and there was an e-mail telling me I had won a DC23 Turbo vacuum from Dyson through the Kids Breathe Better Competition.
I almost deleted it. I thought it was SPAM, a joke, a virus on my MAC.
However it was true. I was one of 500 around the country who won a vacuum.
So it means my writing was maybe not so great with so many winners, but that is besides the point.
I WON.
I needed a vacuum, my estranged husband had my beloved Dyson at his house in the country where it was REALLY needed and I was using my mums spare Dyson upright.
I was so grateful for this wonderful prize and I put it to good work every few days.
This was truly the highlight of my life last year. I told everyone how excited I was to have a new vacuum and be using it.
They all thought I was mad.
That vacuum was a sign of hope to me at that time and I cherish it, (you wouldn't think so if you saw what it lifts from my floors though!).
I was just so lucky.
Try your luck you just never know!
Sunday, 13 November 2011
AMAZING
Wow what can I say?
I was done for the day with my blog.
Then I was asked to do something amazing.
My friend is a very talented photographer, unlike me. She and another three businesses are fundraising for a family and their little girl with profound disabilities and a dazzling smile.
http://www.liahealyblog.com/?p=117
I have tagged and shared where I could and will participate in the clothes swap and donate some wine for gifts and auction.
Tonight however I was asked to "PIMP THE CUBBY".
Apparently that is my skill, my forte, only I can girly it up on a budget, which is great in keeping with my most recent post Thrifty not shifty.
To be asked by friends to help them is a privilege and gives you a great feeling.
To be asked by friends to help complete strangers, well that is an honour that words fail to describe.
I hope to do this little girl, her baby sister and mother and father proud.
Girly stuff is easy and I have everything I need to hopefully make this little Cubby a home for these two little cherubs.
It is a 24/7 workload that is unrelenting and unforgiving to parents of disabled children. It does however come with its own joys and triumphs that parents of non-disabled children won't experience in the same way.
http://www.sayso.com.au/weddings/forums/content/
As many of you know I work amongst many disabled clientele and I love my work. To be able to "play" amongst this family with a child with a disability and hopefully create them something delightful well that will be a joy. The last time I did something voluntarily for a family with a disabled child was back when I was studying and a severely disabled 8yo girl, her mum and grandmother were trialling a patterning program and needed volunteers.
While I have just collected a series of things for our cubby house and when I put it together it will look great, I am delighted that I will get to put my creative genius to further use.
I am so grateful to be asked and hope I do them all proud.
xxxx
I was done for the day with my blog.
Then I was asked to do something amazing.
My friend is a very talented photographer, unlike me. She and another three businesses are fundraising for a family and their little girl with profound disabilities and a dazzling smile.
http://www.liahealyblog.com/?p=117
I have tagged and shared where I could and will participate in the clothes swap and donate some wine for gifts and auction.
Tonight however I was asked to "PIMP THE CUBBY".
Apparently that is my skill, my forte, only I can girly it up on a budget, which is great in keeping with my most recent post Thrifty not shifty.
To be asked by friends to help them is a privilege and gives you a great feeling.
To be asked by friends to help complete strangers, well that is an honour that words fail to describe.
I hope to do this little girl, her baby sister and mother and father proud.
Girly stuff is easy and I have everything I need to hopefully make this little Cubby a home for these two little cherubs.
It is a 24/7 workload that is unrelenting and unforgiving to parents of disabled children. It does however come with its own joys and triumphs that parents of non-disabled children won't experience in the same way.
http://www.sayso.com.au/weddings/forums/content/
As many of you know I work amongst many disabled clientele and I love my work. To be able to "play" amongst this family with a child with a disability and hopefully create them something delightful well that will be a joy. The last time I did something voluntarily for a family with a disabled child was back when I was studying and a severely disabled 8yo girl, her mum and grandmother were trialling a patterning program and needed volunteers.
While I have just collected a series of things for our cubby house and when I put it together it will look great, I am delighted that I will get to put my creative genius to further use.
I am so grateful to be asked and hope I do them all proud.
xxxx
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