CRAZY LITTLE THING CALLED ANGER!

Anger can't always be prevented, nor should it be. Anger is an inevitable emotion, even a protective one when it helps us recognize a problem that we need to try to solve. ~Brazelton and Sparrow


I don't agree with the whole of the above statement. Anger can't always be prevented and with that I agree. I also agree that it can be a protective emotion, in small doses. However, I do not believe it needs to be solved.


Have you ever been so angry you felt you could hurt someone?
Ever yelled so much that your head hurt whilst you were yelling?
Have you ever been so angry that the words coming out of your mouth were not really something you wanted to say, but you had lost control?


Many people feel angry. Anger is a normal emotion, what is not normal is how we let it control our lives. 


What is anger?
Is it just an emotion? 
Is it physical? 
Is it a sensation? 
Is is it an object?


What makes us angry? Who makes us angry?


These are some of the questions we may ask. More important than any of those answers though is why do we let ourselves get angry?


It is not pleasant to feel angry. Our blood pressure rises, our heart rate rises and we make our heart work harder. We send our endocrine system into overdrive producing stress hormones and when this is an ongoing habit that we form, we begin to see it manifest physically. We develop ulcers, frown lines, high blood pressure, a shorter temper, agitated, we worry more and we then get on a circle of being angry little victims in life. Anger very much feels physical and produces unpleasant sensations in our minds and our bodies. So what you may say? Over time and that can be a lifetime or a few months, it takes time from our lives. It is minutes, hours, weeks or days that we can not claim back once we feel happy again. Anger robs us time.


No one has the power to make us angry. No thing has the power to make us angry. There is nothing in the world that wields more power than our own minds can and it is only our state of mind that can reset the balance of power. 


If you look at the Buddhist belief anger is just a state of mind. Anger is not an object. It is not an actual being and it is not something that is actively in control. The buddhists call it a delusion. They do not mean this in the true psychiatric sense of the word, but more that it is a state of mind which is out of balance.


Think of an example of a time when you have been angry. It doesn't matter how angry you were, but what was it that got up your goat so to speak?


Was it the moron in the four wheel drive that cut you off whilst they were talking on their mobile phone?
The boss who gave you a job at the last minute that they need first thing in the morning?
Is is a co-worker who continuously runs late, takes long breaks and never pulls their weight yet always seem to get rewarded?
Are the kids fighting continuously, being demanding, not helping?


What was it that made you angry?


Now that you have recognised the anger trigger what do you do with it?


Let it go.


Seriously, let it go.


What do you gain from being angry about this particular thing or at a person? Will the world end? No it won't.
Sure your house may not get cleaned; the kids may trash it and themselves; you may be late for work; your co-worker will always be an inconsiderate twit and your boss well perhaps you could give them some tips on being organised and delegating responsibly.


I spent a great deal of my life being angry. Angry at and about everything, but really about nothing. There were a few things I could change or control, but the biggest change had to come from me. It is an amazing feeling to let go. It is not easy, it will come in time. The next time that moron cuts you off in traffic you will smile to yourself and arrive to work maybe a few minutes late but at least you will be alive!


As for the rest let it go, in doing so you will save yourself time. 
You won't lose any more time being angry about something you may or may not have any control over. 


If you can make change, that is great we will look at that in time to come. So stay on board with me and I hope you will see things you haven't seen before. This is the gratitude-train and it is great to be alive.


References:
http://demandingjoy.com/?p=1024
http://kadampa.org/en/reference/what-is-the-mind/

The Best Advice from Mother Theresa

THE BEST ADVICE FROM MOTHER THERESA

People are often unreasonable, illogical

and self centred;

Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse

you of  selfish, ulterior motives;

Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some

false friends and some true enemies;

Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank,

people may cheat you;

Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building,

someone could destroy overnight;

Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness,

there may be jealousy;

Be happy anyway.

The good you do today,

people will often forget tomorrow;

Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have,

and it may never be enough;

Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You, in the final analysis,

it is between you and God;

It was never between you and them anyway.

Regardless of your religious views in life, I think that the underlying sentiment in this poem is so true and simple. It makes sense and is something we should all strive to live by. Perhaps this should be in our school curriculums and workplace mission statements!

WHY THE GRATITUDE TRAIN ? ? ?

Our girls love trains. Where they were born and grew up in the first years of life there were no buses, planes or trains. Moving to the city brought a whole new world of excitement to them.

"Ding gates", flashing lights, multiple carriages and train tickets. Something many of you probably grudgingly climb aboard everyday to make the way to work. To my girls it was a whole new world.

In the mid-year school holidays last year I took my girls to a "Day out with Thomas" at the National Rail Museum in Port Adelaide. Prior to that my girls had not watched Thomas the Tank Engine and had only seen pictures. After a day spent riding new and old trains, entertainers such as "The Amazing Drumming Monkeys" and Cool for Kids, sausages in bread and all of the old time fair type amusements I felt like the best mother in the world.

Why?

Well this was one of the lowest times in my life. Yet this day where I forced myself to go out on a cold and wet Sunday, missed the train and had to drive, I was awakened to the joys that do exist in everyday life. Our children. I was truly grateful for my children that day.

Don't get me wrong I loved them more than ever, had never had trouble bonding with them, but never felt 100% that this was "it" in life. That day I realised it was and I did it all by myself.

Now enough of my history lets get to the real history of The Gratitude Train - The Merci Train.

Post World War II the French sent to America 49 boxcars full of gifts from the French people. The boxcars the French sent were originally sent to Europe in World War I and were used throughout both WWI and WWII to transport soldiers to the front. There is also some evidence that they carried Jewish victims to the concentration camps. If their walls could talk, imagine the tales they could tell.

These boxcars transported some soldiers to the place where they would fight for a nation and take their final steps and never come home. There isn't much to them and they are certainly not flash.

There was another train also sent from America to France after the war carrying supplies that the French would need to recover and this travelled across the USA to collect supplies. This train was known as The Friendship Train. This was a symbolic and heartfelt gift that two powerful nations presented to each other powered by the gratitude of everyday people.

So what do we have to be grateful for? To me the list is endless and a gratitude journal or board is a great way to start documenting all the wonderful things that are out there. For me I am grateful that all I have ever wanted to do is help people and do something good. I am a constant thinker, but along with that I think so much I procrastinate.

I am grateful that I love thinking, learning, reading and sharing the things I learn. Does it make me a know it all? Absolutely not, what good is having knowledge if you can't share it? There is no joy in selfishly keeping things to yourself, in sharing we create conversation and in conversation we create friends, with friends we create communities and what better way to connect with people than to share.

So if you have something that you are grateful for and want to share it post a comment with me.

Or if you have an idea to promote gratitude let us know, there are some great minds out there, so don't be afraid to share yours.

Take care it is a great world out there!

References:
http://www.gratitudetrain.typepad.com/ accessed 24/8/2011.
http://www.mercitrain.org/ accessed 25/8/2011

JUMP ABOARD THE GRATITUDE TRAIN

Well hello and welcome to my blog. I am new to the whole concept so bear with me whilst I get my bearings!

I am a proud mum to a pre-schooler and a toddler; wife to a very charismatic man and over enthusiastic employee to three different sectors within nursing. I love them all, I love my life.

It hasn't always been this way with me. I didn't always love my life, I didn't always love being a mother. I didn't always enjoy my nursing and I struggled with guilt and work-life balance issues.

SO what changed? Good question! I am a great believer in fate and that would be my simple explanation. Fate brought me here.

But lets get real. It has been a lot of work, soul searching, support of fabulous friends and fate!

We all have great potential, no matter how exceptional or unexceptional our lives, backgrounds,upbringing or education.

I know this, I believe this and I have seen this.

So jump on board the train, it can and will take you to amazing places.